yey!! FINALLY!!! My hubby asked my hand for marriage.. YEY!!

But we're still arguing of the date.. See, we've been boyfriend - girlfriend thing for 15 years already.. we have 2 kids, our twins.. and we're trying first hand experience of life of being married to each other..

So far, there are ups and downs.. this time, it's far more serious than just jealousy itself..

Nevertheless, we had survived almost 4 years of being together in one roof.. and it's about time HONEY! it's about time, yes! it's about time to hook our life by binding under one God and sharing our life to others..

See, it's not a difficult thing.. but, we'll see.. it's just the start of sparks and dynamites.. *whew*


As always, why is crying associated with death?? is it that somebody dear to us would slowly fade away from the living world and unite with the soil? or is it that, it's just it.. that crying should always be initiated on death..

I am so troubled with the sad news that brought me to cry.. Our closest friend of all, lost their mother..

their mom, uncle, sister and several others aboard a tamaraw fx went to fetch their dad who had a stroke.. and on its way back home, as they were rushing because of the condition of their father, they drove faster than their usual and was accidentally bumped by a truck with sand and gravel loaded at the back..

The driver and the passenger at his back, instantly died on the spot.. their mom was still unconscious but breathing at the time that the helpful people brought them to the hospital..

when my close friends knew of the accident, they instantly requested for a city ambulance to pick up their mom, who's in a bad condition, sister, who's hurt the most and had a lot of bleeding areas, and their dad, who had a stroke..

my friend, went to davao doctor's hospital to tend to her mother, was happy when she saw her mother's feet.. but the happiness faded when she saw her mom's face..

it's a sad day for me.. but of course, the consideration that they're our bestest friends, the life of their mom is still a loss for all of us..

*sigh*.. and sob.. I will miss her..


ADDICTEDly yours

Lately, I haven't seem to be doing the right things at work..

See, I had been totally addicted to those movie still, anagrams, pick up line quizzes, etc.. I can't seem to get enough of these and had been searching and searching for more..

anyway.. I would want to share a few links of what I'm trying to tell you..

well.. if you aren't convinced enough, try searching again.. but I had find quizardy to be totally cool!..

click on..


Something's wrong with me..

I have hyperthyroidism.. and it's getting bigger and bigger everyday.. some would say that it still doesn't show but I say, it does.. I'm too shy to have myself pictured.. and would be too shy until I have this thing plucked out of my neck..

I have talked to an endophthalmologist, if I'm not mistaken.. and from what she told me, it's a toxic hyperthyroidism.. she had actually helped me by explaining what it could do to my body and what the effects are.
  • toxic hyperthyroidism can be measured. while I forgot how big is mine, she says that it's already showing.
  • hyperthyroidism will affect my heart eventually. It will bring my heart into a confused state.
  • hyperthyroidism will easily tire you out. Walking a short distance would actually mean that one has to go on panting and gasping for breathe.
  • hyperthyroidism will make your eyes bigger with black circles around.
  • pregnancy during hyperthroidism is acceptable.
  • women who went over birth doesn't actually get hyperthyroidism by shouting. it has no effect when you give birth.
  • hyperthyroidism's signs are sorethroats and a rough voice.

and according to the specialist, you could get these either by an iodine deficiency or when you have excess of iodine. Iodized salt, she says, isn't much of a help since when one uses iodized salt, they use it as condiments and at small proportions.

As she went on explaining of it, she came across the means one opts to take for curing the thryoid. Radiation, Surgery or Medication.

Medication would be the easiest. if a body reacts to the medicine after a certain time of taking it, the person wouldn't need to undergo radiation or surgery anymore.

If a body reacted to the medication by shrinking the thyroid a bit, radiation would be the next step.

If the thyroid has already neutralize but the thyroid is still big, surgery is the answer to it. But after surgery, the thyroid might come back.

However which way, partially, I'm scared and the other half is pushing me to go on surgery. But, having wouldn't mean a 100% of a clear thyroid. It may come back and I wouldn't wanna go on another surgery the 3rd time.

and if eventually it comes back, I have to curse science for the discoveries and science for their overly defective medicinal blah blah creations..

Oh well.. oh well.. oh well..


Harting hart

Dir Ate Tsaro,

Ona po sa lahat, pasinsya na po kung medyu iisipen mo pa ang akeng mga ispelling. Hende po kase ako nakapagtapos ng hayskol. hanggang grid 2 lang po ako.

Sesemulan ko ang akeng kuwinto belang katolong. Ako po ay labenwalo taon golang na po. Lakeng Agosan del Sor po ako. Eniwe, sa kaherapan po ng bohay, pomonta po akong maynela at nakepagsapalaran.

Tatlong lengo den po ako ng pomareto at pomaroon, at nahelo po ako. Sinwirti naman po ako at nakapag tarbaho ako sa amu kong Kano na may asawang Finoy.

Nageng tagapag lenes po ako ng bahay nela na ala maynsyun sa lake. Mabaet po ang akeng amo at malake po ang begay na sewildu sa aken. Lemang Lebo po ang natangap ko sa semula nong taong 2003.

Umekot po ang akeng kwinto nang makelala ko si Inting. Na nlab agad ako ate tsaro, sana tama po ang ispelling ng pangalan niyo. Towing di op ko, nagkeketa kame sa lunita. Hangang sa esang araw na nakoha nya po ang akeng heyas, ang akeng pagkababai.

Semula po noon natapus po yaon, e, hende na nagpaketa sa akin si Inting. Mahal na mahal ko po si Inting ate Tsaro. Kaya nga pamensan ay tolala ako at tenatanong ng aking amung Kano na "Wat is hafin nday?" at ang sagot ko naman "Nateng sir ay am jas miss". Kaherap talaga ang inglis ate tsaro.

Piro, bomalek uli tayo sa kuwintu ko, sa kabotehan, hende naman po nagbonga ang mga nangyare. At nagpatoloy po ako sa akeng werk. Nang esang araw ay bomalek si Inting.

Nalaman ko na lang po nun na nag-asawa na pala sya ng esang taga sibwano. Ang saket po, ets harts talaga ate tsaro. bumubulatlat po ang akeng hart sa saket.

Anu po ang akeng gagawen? Mahal ko po seya at hende naman po kame naghiwalay ng purmal.

Si Nday pram Agusan Del Sor

pi es. pake gret nyo lang po ang akeng nanay na si ipipanya at tatay na si epipanyo. Magpapadala lang po ako ng pira sa susunod na lenggo. Sana ay begyan naman ako ng tamang sahud. At sa kapated kung si Babuy, hende po ako nagbebero ate tsaro, babuy po talaga ang neknem nya, na mag-aral sya ng mabute.


the past, the present and the future

since I was a child and up until now, my family groomed me up to be a creature loving, friendly and a down-to-earth person.. yet so, I was as decent and as graceful as a bird..

growing up years weren't as hard as it used to be.. there were days when we have nothing to worry about instead sought to pick the sweet smelling flowers for the dining table.. there were days when my childhood friends and I, would go up to the highest step of the oak tree and sit on an old tire hooked to a tree and swing all day long.. Nothing would make my day right when I couldn't go on diving to the lake in between our house and the lighthouse..

Indeed, it's such wonderful thought to look back to yet the present speaks otherwise..

2 years ago, I had my first babies, and yes they're babies, my pride and joy, my twins.. As I grew up loving them, until my last breathe, thinking that having babies will be the most wonderful thing that a woman can have, I have overlooked the problem of the financial support that I must have to take good care of them..

and with what luck and hardships of getting a degree, I had my first average paying job.. and with that job, I am raising my twins the way I wanted to be.. If only the pay is enough..

Not only that, problems arise everytime I save some.. *sigh*.. ailing babies that could make your bank account turn over upside down in just 1 second and returning you back to nothing.. but my pride couldn't be taken away for having such wonderful kids and I wouldn't want nothing more than to have them learn in a good school, go to college, get a high paying job and marry a decent girl after having saved enough for the wedding..

I haven't had that wedding yet.. Everytime I get to meet a guy, the whole world would turn against me.. Maybe, I'm not meant to get married after all.. Maybe, I'm meant to be all alone through my lifetime.. Maybe, I'm meant to be my children's sole parent.. and Maybe, I must concentrate on what my career points at for my kids..

But in the end, after a long day of filling up blank papers, filing them onto a cabinet and checking on all of the furnished list, I'd sigh and look at my wishlist.. that someday.. maybe someday.. things will turn just right..


Geek in the making

They call me G-E-E-K ! Maybe it's true..


I have forever been one since I was born.. I love complex Science, from the composotions of a flower to the complicated Organic Chemistry, the olefins, amine, amide, hydrocarbons, to the parts of a human body..

I have curly hair and uneven teeth.. I always love to carry dull colored, stupid hats that are outrageous.. I carry with me my diary, a thick letter A to B encyclopedia, my most loved pen, technicolor stabilos and a wide, out-of-date backpack..

My mom is a socialite and loves the crowd.. I remember that she used to tell me, "Darling, why don't you cut out reading and explore the outer dimensions of this universe".. and so, I did.. I can't help doing comparisons to what I was doing and what those brainless jerk jocks do most of the time.. ask questions of, why do kids love rollerblading so much? why everyone loves music.. and soon, I found out, I screwed going out..

that I love my room.. I love my black, flat screened pentium 4 computer with radeon video card, a writable cd-rom and zip drive.. I love my little bookshelf, my alphabetically arranged encyclopedia, my fiction books, poetry, dante alegheiri books..

that I love being me, the lifeless Geek that vanishes in her so-called teleportation room and dreams of molecules..

A thought to ponder on..

So why the HECK did I write this? NOTHING.. My mind is blank after all the holidays.. I even forgot how my handwriting looked like.. *sigh*.. I don't even know how to liven things up.. I'm just plain "Boring"..

hmm.. so now you got me right here and when you looked around, it seems to you that it's far less interesting than the most boring book that you had digged out from your mini library.. and you started to put it back and search for a far more lively story written by a familiar author and you found something that could make you read until you sleep while the characters of the book transfer on your wide forehead..

I'll cut the bullshit straight.. It's just one of these days make you want to stay at one corner and sulk.. a bad day, it's as if you were right there at the spot when the tsunami broke phuket and you were the only survivor.. a survivor after seeing all the bodies, all wounded bodies, all lifeless blue and black bodies..

why am I writing these things? well, they get into my nerve.. and my nerve just said, "CUT THE CRAP, MAN!"