Dear Papa God,
Is it too much to ask for extreme patience, understanding and optimism? Because it's literally running out already.
Lately, I had been experiencing a lot of heartaches from someone whom I expected to support me in every decision that I make, be it good or bad. After all, it's for a long term goal. Yet much to my disappointment, my day always start and end with a lot of painful words being thrown at me. Now, I'm not even sure what "through thick and thin" really meant anymore.
I never regretted making mistakes in life, even if it meant falling and standing back again. I never regretted going through a rough road, even at times when the road is full of piercing stones and the only choice I have to move on is to walk without any shoes on.
To be honest Father, even if I had no regrets, I still can't take off the thoughts of giving up and going back to the place where I feel that I really belong, home. If only I didn't have any children to think of or any responsibilities to face, I would be glad to just leave everything behind and go back to where I started.
At times that I'm at my lowest, I try to put on a poker face and smile like there's nothing wrong. At times, I wanted to drown myself with beer just to cover the pain that I feel even if it's just a temporary solution.
Right now, Father, I feel lost, drained and empty. But I am going to choose the greater good: move on and assure myself that I'm doing the right thing.
Please help me understand all these things Father.
Love, Sweepz
2 comments:
hehehe... sounds so family. but i found a way to sometimes get around that... not sure though if its right. i guess that's what this journey is about - life. just don't be too sticky to it... it always passes... remember that God's hands is always holding you all the way... :)
Thank you for the kind words. I think I know you really well. :) hehehe and yes, that's life. full of complications but in the end, fulfilling.
Post a Comment