Complications

Dear Papa Jesus,

Growing up in a Catholic community, we were taught that things happen for a reason. That they may be called as fate, destiny or lessons which we have to go through in this life. The reason, we may not know until we get older. 

I just honestly feel sad Papa Jesus. Especially for my dad and, moreso, my mom.

See, when I came into this world, I was introduced to the complications within a family. That we don't live in a normal family setup like what we read in the books and what most of us dreamed of.

Our grandparents are from the Land of the Rising Sun. Our grandpa came to the Philippines way ahead than our grandma. He was engaged in logging and worked his way to where he was before he passed. Throughout his years in the logging industry, he travelled to different places in Mindanao, had his share of experiences in different industries, saved and had several children from his Filipina partner. 

My grandma who was left in China, on the other hand, bore a child but passed because of complications. She, then, decided to adopt, and that was our dad. When she arrived in the Philippines, she had 3 more: 2 of whom were born from her and another 1 was from her sister whom she adopted as her own daughter.

Fast forward, my grandpa had a total of 11 children. My dad and aunt who is residing in Manila are adopted, 2 from their "bloodline" and 7 from the other wife.

Why am I telling you these? To be frank, Papa Jesus, I don't really give a shit where each one of them came from. I grew up and learned that they are family. They are supposed to be "family". Families should stick together through thick or thin, good or bad, happy and sad times, yet, sad to say, we are left out. Always had been left out yet we didn't complain.

Declarations to people that we are part of the family will remain as declarations. We know better.

I honestly feel sad for dad. He really deserved better if not the best. He was robbed of life, of time. To be frank, Father, I don't even feel that any of them gave him the respect he deserved. Again, as what we were taught many times, we may not know the reason, but I pray that we could at least know the reason why we need to give them the respect that I'm not sure they deserve.

In all honesty, Father, I can now understand why mom wanted to leave this City and go back to her sisters in Manila. And she probably just couldn't because we, her children, won't. 

So, for now, we're stuck in a situation where family shares with us through story telling their moments as "family" while we, as always, didn't know anything of. 

By the way, Papa Jesus, these are just my sentiments and I honestly am not after any invitation from them. Never did expect anything from them. Never felt a twinge of anger nor jealousy when I see pictures from different occasions they hold.

It's alright, though. All's still well.

Love, Sweepz